That's right, folks! Your favourite emu (actually, I might not show up as an emu here... maybe one of those sepia emo types, with a custom location, I might add, but not an emu, alas) has fallen in love! It's taken me eighteen years, six months and twenty-nine days, but I've finally been struck by cupid's arrow.

Her name is Tactus. Optimus Tactus. We call her little Oppy-Tac for short, and damn is she fiiiine.

She's also a keyboard, but who are you to say that such a...