Hey,
I'm a little caught for time, so I'll comment on the journal entry first and do a crit of the rest during the week.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Virtual_Space  Some may view me as an aging fool, attempting [to] write himself into the history books before he passes from the world. I am out to prove them wrong, and secure my place amongst the great visionaries this galaxy has to offer. |
Firstly, you're missing a "to". Secondly, he says people think he's just trying to write himself into the history books, and that he'll prove them wrong and (effectively) secure his place in the history books. At least, that is what that last line means to me, so I cannot see him proving anyone wrong in this instance, but right. I suggest rewriting it.
Keep writing
-D