Thog's Masterclass from the 300th Ansible!

[J-Sun]

Painfully funny abuse of language.

I could probably post links to every issue of Ansible but I just had to pass this one on - I had to look the guy up to believe he and this book existed. Special 300th-Issue Technothriller Bons Mots Dept. - there's a couple of random gems first and then it goes into the one masterpiece with many examples.

I think my very favorite - it's so hard to choose - was "Hartmann too smiled but it was not a creature of grace; it skitted, like a new-born faun and, in similar fashion, fell down completely before another second had died." Ow. My stomach - he hurts from the laughing.

[The Procrastinator]

Thanks for the actual laugh out loud, J-Sun. What a list. This one wasn't bad either:

'He picked up his coat from the back of the sofa and moved to the door, feeling distinctly like an ambulant and green soft fruit.'

I'm trying to think of a fruit that is both green and soft. Kiwifruit?

[HareBrain]

Originally Posted by The Procrastinator

Thanks for the actual laugh out loud, J-Sun. What a list. This one wasn't bad either:

'He picked up his coat from the back of the sofa and moved to the door, feeling distinctly like an ambulant and green soft fruit.'

I'm trying to think of a fruit that is both green and soft. Kiwifruit?

It's possible (mere speculation without context) that he means gooseberry, which is (British?) slang for an unwanted third person on a date, hence his leaving. As Nigel Tuffnel said in Spinal Tap, it's a fine line between clever and stupid.

[Ursa major]

Reading

Eisenmenger could feel the atmosphere [between the two women] beginning to reek with noxious gases.'

it's easy to imagine Eisenmenger walking into a room where someone had been using Fabreeze and thinking, The room had a de-stinked atmosphere.