Review: 2012 - A disaster of a movie (SPOILERS WITHIN!)

[worldmaker]

Incensed, so much I have to put metaphorical pen to cybernetic paper, thus herein are my views, thoughts and the venting of spleen, etc.

Now I don't mind the underlying premise. The writers have to hand the story on something and the huge upheavals in the Earth are as good as any excuse for a story Hollywood can come up with, so I'll let them off for that. (Please, if you're a geologist or astrophysicist don't tell me off there, yes I know, unrealistic, etc.)

So let us at the underlying storyline.

A billion euros (a bit like a foreign dollar, very alien and un-America, gosh what were the producers thinking, poking fun at the feebleness of the good ol' greenback!?), for your safe seat on the "last ship out of the end of the world".

Sound like a good deal, to any half-wit. But how much does it really cost to build your own ship for you, your family, friends, girlfriends, mistresses and other totty? A couple of hundred million, and a few hundred million to spare for some other luxuries, like a few more ships?

So all the half-wits are to be packed away on a magical, mysterious "big ship" to save their lives.

Right. Yes. I think not.

Oh, and don't forget to kill of all the non-U people, those who don't "fit" the magical ships, like foreigners who aren't proper Americans, ie., born in America or as rich as an America.

As for big ships, obviously the half-wit population of the world haven't noticed the huge cruise ships already floating around the world, so easily modified, oh and the vast aircraft carriers that could airlift an entire town to safety, oh, and... But of course these are "special ships" for special people, not like all the nuclear submarines in the world though.

As so we sail off into the sunset heading for a new home, where all the foreign people have already settled because it didn't get harmed too much in the end of the world (of America), so we can conquer it as soon as we arrive by offering them Trade Goods.

Let this sink in the mire of it's own doom.

[Teresa Edgerton]

Thread moved to Reviews.

[Rodders]

So it's safe to say that you didn't enjoy it then, Worldmaker?

[asher marquering]

i just wanted to say

yay cape town survives

its my home city if thats a thing

[dustinzgirl]

The idea of massive survival ships is not new, and completely plausible.

Sure, you could build a darn good ship for a few million euro. But if you wanted to build a damn good ship, you spend a few billion.

I do, however, think that the majority of the things shown on the commercials look outrageously impossible. Like driving a car off the back of a big airplane. Um, no. Not going to happen. I think the windsheer alone would make it impossible to survive.

However, John Cusack can do no wrong. Except Serendipity, but we pretend that movie was never made. I haven't seen 2012 yet, I'm just saying, a multibillion dollar ship isn't an unreasonable amount, and considering inflation and the influence of the euro and lack of greenbacks, its entirely possible.

[Omphalos]

Im going to go see it tomorrow. Ive already resigned myself to hating the story, loving the eye-candy.

[Rodders]

I just don't fancy this so i really doubt if i'll be seeing it. Even on it's DVD release and subsequent downfall into the bargain bin.

[worldmaker]

Originally Posted by Rodders

So it's safe to say that you didn't enjoy it then, Worldmaker?

Oh I enjoyed all the CGI, but the logic and "Go-America-GO!" mushiness didn't work with me.

[worldmaker]

Originally Posted by dustinzgirl

The idea of massive survival ships is not new, and completely plausible.

Sure, you could build a darn good ship for a few million euro. But if you wanted to build a damn good ship, you spend a few billion.

Last year I designed a small expedition yacht for millionaire buyers in the middle east. Self-righting in the event of severe storms or poor captains, crew of about ten, accommodates twenty in luxury, plus upto four cars two speedboats and a helicopter, with a cruising range of 20,000 miles, for a sale price of about £100 million. So one billionaire could buy a fleet of ten of these instead of one tiny cabin on a "supership".

As for the film. What had me laughing at the end was the "stupendous" size of these "super-ships". They looked about the same as an over-dressed aircraft carrier - cost about $10 billion, crew complement about 6,000, plus a hundred aircraft and nuclear reactors; or an armour-plated Queen Mary II - cost £850 million, with luxury accommodation for about 4,000 passengers and 2,000 crew.

See what I mean?
Grrrrrrr.

[worldmaker]

Originally Posted by Rodders

I just don't fancy this so i really doubt if i'll be seeing it. Even on it's DVD release and subsequent downfall into the bargain bin.

Wait for the bargain bin in the supermarket, that's what I did for Independence Day - just to remove it from influencing impressionable children.

[worldmaker]

Originally Posted by Omphalos

Im going to go see it tomorrow. Ive already resigned myself to hating the story, loving the eye-candy.

The eye candy is great, you could close your ears to the rest.

[worldmaker]

Originally Posted by asher marquering

i just wanted to say

yay cape town survives

its my home city if thats a thing

Be great to imagine a sequel in which the survivors reach Cape Town and are dealt with by all the S.Africans waiting on the beach, armed, with revenge on their minds for not being warned by all these selfish, greedy, self-serving rich folk and politicians.

He he he!

[Omphalos]

Originally Posted by worldmaker

Be great to imagine a sequel in which the survivors reach Cape Town and are dealt with by all the S.Africans waiting on the beach, armed, with revenge on their minds for not being warned by all these selfish, greedy, self-serving rich folk and politicians.

He he he!

You might get your wish.

2013!! Emmerich Plotting TV Sequel To 2012!! -- Ain't It Cool News: The best in movie, TV, DVD, and comic book news.

[dustinzgirl]

Originally Posted by worldmaker

Last year I designed a small expedition yacht for millionaire buyers in the middle east. Self-righting in the event of severe storms or poor captains, crew of about ten, accommodates twenty in luxury, plus upto four cars two speedboats and a helicopter, with a cruising range of 20,000 miles, for a sale price of about £100 million. So one billionaire could buy a fleet of ten of these instead of one tiny cabin on a "supership".

As for the film. What had me laughing at the end was the "stupendous" size of these "super-ships". They looked about the same as an over-dressed aircraft carrier - cost about $10 billion, crew complement about 6,000, plus a hundred aircraft and nuclear reactors; or an armour-plated Queen Mary II - cost £850 million, with luxury accommodation for about 4,000 passengers and 2,000 crew.

See what I mean?
Grrrrrrr.

Yeah in 2009.....

But not in 2012!!!

[worldmaker]

Originally Posted by Omphalos

You might get your wish.

2013!! Emmerich Plotting TV Sequel To 2012!! -- Ain't It Cool News: The best in movie, TV, DVD, and comic book news.

ARRRRRGGGHHHH!!!!!!!!!

(sound of feet racing for the hills, to launch in my Orion spaceship - only $1 billion to you sir, very fast take-off, trillion mile range takes two hundred people - and flee it all.....)

And where are all the nuclear submarines?
And the ships that rode out the waves in the deep sea?
And the people flying above it all in their hot air balloons?
And the tens of millions who noticed nothing, because it all took place in America?

So many options.

I'm thinking of my own alternative script... "The Other End Of The World."