Speech

[Threddy]

If you're writing something like:

Toshu shook his head before answering.

Would you then start the speech on the next line or after that.

So...

Toshu shook his head before answering.
'Blah blah blah...'

or

Toshu shook his head before answering. 'Blah blah blah.'

With the second option, could you change it to a comma or a colon?

[Interference]

Toshu shook his head before answering, 'Blah blah blah.'

But personally I would prefer taking the breath, lingering a little on the pause while the head is shaking, as represented by:

Toshu shook his head before answering.
'Blah blah blah...'

[Threddy]

Ok, thanks Interference. That's what I've done mostly in my book so that's good news.

[Boneman]

It seems that either will do, and I admit to preferring:

Toshu shook his head before answering.
'Blah blah blah...'

And what you have put is correct, a full stop.

[HareBrain]

Why not just:

Toshu shook his head. 'Blah blah blah.'

I like critiquing single lines. More please!

[Ursa major]

As far as I know, Threddy, one can do it either way (and I've seen it done both ways).



Personally, I have got into the habit of using the descriptive text as a mechanism for identifying the speaker, so that in your example

Toshu shook his head before answering. 'Blah blah blah.'

it is clear that it is Toshu who is saying 'Blah blah blah.'


But if your style is to have two paragraphs and it is clear (by whatever other means) who is saying what, that should be fine.

[MistingWolf]

Mm. I do it the same way as Ursa major. But yeah, both methods are acceptable. :}

[Culhwch]

I think if you're going to a new line, you've got to make it very obvious that the identified character is speaking. In a conversation, generally new paragraphs (and thus, new lines) indicate a change of speaker. So I'd recommend keeping it on the one line. Actually, I'd never consider doing it the first way, in that example. I can't think of where I would use that form.

[Interference]

Gonna revise my suggestion just a little, and I'm sure everyone has seen examples of it done this way:

Toshu shook his head before answering.
'Blah blah blah,' he said.

[Threddy]

Interference, your point has lead to another question from me about speech:

Is this wrong:

'I am speaking.' Said Toshu.

is it better like this:

'I am speaking,' said Toshu.

I would normally put the Toshu first but I wanted to emphasise the point.

[Interference]

The comma after the speech and before the quotes and attribution, so said rather than Said, as in your second example.

You can play around to your heart's content stylistically with "he said", "said he", even placing it before or after the speech for variety, but it will depend entirely on the style of the story you're telling.

[Threddy]

Is the full stop wrong or do you just prefer the comma. I'm worried I might have changed halfway through my book and will have to go through changing all the speech.

[Interference]

As far as I know, the full stop is wrong in this instance. These eaxmples may clarify:

"I can't think of any examples," he said as he walked from the room.
"I can't think of any examples either." Dorothy grimaced and whistled tunelessly. Then she had an idea that made her murmur with repressed excitement, "Hey, what about this ..."

In the first, 'he said' is a direct attribution of the speech and is preceeded by the comma.

The second gives a clear indication of who is speaking, but it is a separate action from the speech and is preceded by a full stop. In the final cases, we are again attributing the dialogue directly, including a description of how it is spoken, but before the speech, so it has a comma.

There's probably a clearer set of rules for this, but I hope I've given you something to ponder ...

[KESpires]

The full stop is technically wrong.

Basically if you choose to identify the speaker after the sentence with the quotation marks you need to use a comma even if the quotation is a complete sentence.

"I am speaking," said I.

If it ends with an exclamation or a question you treat it the same way, following with a lower case letter and ending the sentence with a period after identifying the speaker or having an adverb or an adverbial phrase if you so choose.

"I am speaking!" said I, harsh and with a grimace.

OR

"Am I speaking?" asked I.

Of course if you choose not to identify the speaker because the speaker's identity is obvious, you need to end the sentence with the correct punctuation inside the quotation marks.

"I am speaking!"

"Am I speaking?"

"You are speaking."

But otherwise, should you identify the speaker following the sentence, you'll replace the interior period with a comma and end the sentence after identifying the speaker.

Now, here is the interesting thing. If you peruse through a wide variety of works you'll encounter folks like Jim Harrison, James Joyce, and Cormac McCarthy who don't use quotation marks. Joyce and Harrison use a similar technique and employ em dashes before dialogue but no quotation marks. McCarthy just forgoes them altogether, saying that if you write properly the reader knows who is speaking and there is no reason to "clutter up the page" with little marks.

It's interesting.

McCarthy's dialogue looks like this:

To his father he said: I'm not interested.

Why? his father asked.

Joyce and Harrison's dialogue looks like this:

--What am I supposed to do?
--I don't know.

Interesting techniques and after a lot of hesitation I'm experimenting with the method. It is interesting, to say the least.

But I'm going to suggest something and don't think I'm being sarcastic. Cliff Notes makes a Grammar book. It is small, slim, and very good. It covers all the basic questions in an easy to find indexed edition. I own it. It's handy and useful in a pinch.

You can of course break the rules of grammar. McCarthy, Joyce, and Harrison do it a lot and are all successful writers. But you must know which rules you are breaking.

[Ursa major]

I think the problem may come where the preceding description gets quite long:

Toshu shook his head before answering. It was a bad habit of his, one he knew infuriated his followers. And his family: many was the time that his mother had rebuked him for this failing, telling him that at best it showed that he could not keep his feelings to himself, at worst it revealed his congenital indecision, a sad inheritance from his weak-willed father.

"Blah, blah, blah," he said, and at once felt foolish. His hopelessly long-winded introspection had once more robbed him of his vocabulary.

Or something like that. Obviously I've overdone it for effect, but there must be a point when the one paragraph must become two, even when - as is not the case here - there is a single idea behind the words.