The Asylum

[Interference]

* A platoon of Fear Ants heads towards the colonies through InterSpace carrying snow to the snowless *

[Grimward]

I THOUGHT you were down there, Rosie, but it's been a crazy and sad month here...the grey matter had to archive some details to make room for other stuffs....

Let's hope things don't get any worse there, aye? I imagine you'd settle for having the cyclones (if you have to have them at all, that is) put out the fires first? Terrible about the rivers drying up and farmers losing their livelihood...

*Cheers on Inty's Ants, who probably should not be confused with Inty's Aunts, no disrespect intended!*

[Rosemary]

I'm sorry about the grey matter, Grim! It seems to happen to quite a few people these days

Yes, it isn't good with the weather but other countries have had it far worse than us.

*Watches as the Fear Ants head off*

[Interference]

You really don't want to meet my Fear Aunts, Grim. Hell, I don't want to meet them ... not again. Dear God, never again ....

*crumples into a heap and gibbers about aunts in general and fear aunts in particular *

*Inter reaches through to the Third Astral Plane where there is, apparently, a record of every scientific experiment ever conducted, including, as far as he recalls, one for merging planetary climates *

[Grimward]

They certainly sound as bad or worse than my Fire Aunts, your Destroyership, sir....

Ace, doesn't the Brownie have something on Spectral Methods for Climatic Merges in the Library?

[Rosemary]

Please don't gibber Mr Inter, about ants and aunts, I'm sure they are not that bad.

I hope you are right about there being a record of merging our worlds climates.

*Puts the kettle on for another cuppa, for the gibbering Inter*

[The Ace]

Probably, anyone got a single malt ?

[Grimward]

*Sends a thermal over to Sep for some GlenMorangie*

Forgot. Here you go....

*Fiery disk floats underneath the proffered shot glass (or does he need it by the tankard?), then zips it over to The Ace...*

One tome, coming up?

[The Ace]

One brown blur later, there's a large, black leather-bound book on the dining-table, smack in the middle of Freda's jigsaw.

"He has his moments."

[Rosemary]

Why is a single malt now a tome?

Still, weirder things have happened in the tea room that's for sure!

[Interference]

* still searching *

Climate boost, climate borst, climate choo (gazundheit), climate courses, climate curses, climate dirge, climate 1500 feet, climb every mountain -- hmm, misfiled ... - climate immersion, climate imaging, climate inversion, climate lurch, climate lurk, climate lust ... hmm, I'll just mark that one for later ... .....

Goodness, all these tomes, there'll never be enough time to read them all. I just hope I can fit in the occasional e-mail along the way ... Tome or not tome, that is the qu- Ah, what's this ... ? Climate Martians? Never knew they were still operating ...

[Grimward]

*Sends a spinning fiery disk to bring the tome over to Inty*

Use the tome, instead, unless you're afraid you'll destroy the words in it....

The Brownie requires payment (in single malt), Ms. Rosie, for his services....

*Peers over Inty's shoulder to see what the tome might reveal....*

[Rosemary]

Oh of course! I was thinking it was Ace wanting the single malt for himself

Good evening Mr Brownie.

Peers over Grim's shoulder to see what's in the tome.

I love tomes, they are so interesting.

[Grimward]

I agree.

Hey, what's that about Climate Marriages.....oh, sorry, that's Climactic Marriages....

*Notes that Inty's on the wrong chapter......something about personality merges....and uses a thermal to blow the pages to page 2,937, CLIMATE CHANGES....*

[Interference]

Here it is! Climate merging! Thanks, Grim, this looks like exactly the thing we need.

*reading*

"First, catch your climate."

Darn! That's us scuppered. It keeps changing so fast, how is anyone meant to catch it?

* there is a faint odour of lavender emerging from the InterSpacial Portal *

Hold on ... I know that scent ... Oh, no ... It's - It's ....

* The portal opens and out steps ... *

Angrianna, the worst Fear Aunt of the all!!!!!!

"Put that down, stop doing that, where do you think you are, where's my gin, comb your hair, boy, get some hair, boy, doesn't anyone ever dust around here .... ??????"