new meds on the market . . . - Science Fiction Fantasy Chronicles: forums

Texane · 28th November 2002, 09:43 AM

St. Mom's Wort
Plant extract that treats mom's depression by rendering preschooler unconscious for up to six hours.
_______________

Empty Nestrogen
Highly effective suppository that eliminates melancholy by enhancing the memory of how awful they were as teenagers and how you couldn't wait till they moved out.
______________

Peptobimbo

Liquid silicone for single women. Two full cups swallowed before an evening out increases breast size, decreases intelligence, and improves flirting.
______________

Dumerol
When taken with Peptobimbo, can cause dangerously low I.Q. causing enjoyment of country western music.
_______________

Flipitor
Increases life expectancy of commuters by controlling road rage and the urge to flip off other drivers.
_______________

Antiboyotics
When administered to teenage girls, is highly effective in improving grades, freeing up phone lines, and reducing money spent on make-up.
_______________

Menicillin
Potent antibiotic for older women. Increases resistance to such lines as, "You make me want to be a better person ....can we get naked now?"
_______________

Buyagra
Injectable stimulant taken prior to shopping.Increases potency and duration of spending spree.
_______________

Extra Strength Buy-One-all
When combined with Buyagra, can cause an indiscriminate buying frenzy so severe the victim may even come home with a Donnie Osmond CD or a book by Dr. Laura.
______________

Jack Asspirin
Relieves the headache caused by a man who can't remember your birthday, anniversary or phone number.
______________

Anti-talksident
A spray carried in a purse or wallet to be used on anyone too eager to share their life stories with total strangers.
_______________

Sexicedrin
More effective than Excedrin in treating the, "Not now, dear, I have a headache," syndrome.
_______________

Ragamet
When administered to a husband, provides the same irritation as ragging on him all weekend, saving the wife the time and trouble of doing it herself.

:upto:

Mariel · 28th November 2002, 02:08 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Texane
St. Mom's Wort
Plant extract that treats mom's depression by rendering preschooler unconscious for up to six hours.

May I have a very large bottle of this please? :rolly2:
:blpaw:

28th November 2002, 09:43 AM	#1 (permalink)
Texane Frelling Wicked Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Texas (of course!) Posts: 3,877	new meds on the market . . . St. Mom's Wort Plant extract that treats mom's depression by rendering preschooler unconscious for up to six hours. _______________ Empty Nestrogen Highly effective suppository that eliminates melancholy by enhancing the memory of how awful they were as teenagers and how you couldn't wait till they moved out. ______________ Peptobimbo Liquid silicone for single women. Two full cups swallowed before an evening out increases breast size, decreases intelligence, and improves flirting. ______________ Dumerol When taken with Peptobimbo, can cause dangerously low I.Q. causing enjoyment of country western music. _______________ Flipitor Increases life expectancy of commuters by controlling road rage and the urge to flip off other drivers. _______________ Antiboyotics When administered to teenage girls, is highly effective in improving grades, freeing up phone lines, and reducing money spent on make-up. _______________ Menicillin Potent antibiotic for older women. Increases resistance to such lines as, "You make me want to be a better person ....can we get naked now?" _______________ Buyagra Injectable stimulant taken prior to shopping.Increases potency and duration of spending spree. _______________ Extra Strength Buy-One-all When combined with Buyagra, can cause an indiscriminate buying frenzy so severe the victim may even come home with a Donnie Osmond CD or a book by Dr. Laura. ______________ Jack Asspirin Relieves the headache caused by a man who can't remember your birthday, anniversary or phone number. ______________ Anti-talksident A spray carried in a purse or wallet to be used on anyone too eager to share their life stories with total strangers. _______________ Sexicedrin More effective than Excedrin in treating the, "Not now, dear, I have a headache," syndrome. _______________ Ragamet When administered to a husband, provides the same irritation as ragging on him all weekend, saving the wife the time and trouble of doing it herself. :upto:

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