I absolutely love Creation myths, and this one's a corker, Sue - works beautifully. I particularly liked the mythology surrounding the robin. Great stuff.
Considering you expected to see a fair few errors in this, I didn't see many myself - only these minor ones:
Quote:
| But no answer could they find, as how this might be done |
Missing "to" after as.
Quote:
| but also knew to many long, hot days would destroy that richness |
too
Quote:
| the Maiden Time became aware of some one standing by her side. |
someone