Originally Posted by ctg
The most important question in my mind is does the prose at below hook you enough, or am I again treading down a well worn road?
I know that I need to shape the narrator's voice before it really strikes the nerve, but as a man, writing female thoughts is something that I haven't done before.
Does she comes across as a man or as a woman?
To answer your question - Not quite.
The first para is the main barrier to the bait. It has fine points but for me it's not active enough. A quick outline of the interrogator and get the the first question in quickly along the lines of
He was balding with big square classes and bad mouth hygiene.
"For the record your name is ...
Before she answers she could speculate on why she wouldn't bite him - doubting whether her fangs would be able to get through the layers of fat or some such.
That way you establish the sex immediately (though why you think this is important I'm not sure).
As for the description of the interrogator he seems normal they come in all shapes and sizes.
As for the rest.
Being a vampire isn't an occupation - It's not as though there's career progression. Though she would probably have a job which could be vampire related but it could just as easily be a hairdresser.
Do vampires crave cigarettes?
Stepping outside traditionally wouldn't be a good idea - sunlight etc.
What war? - Given she was > 200 years.
I thought it was thirty silvers.
When You describe the old gentleman as such it jars against your later revelation. it would be better to describe him as young looking and then explain how appearances are deceptive.
Hope I helped