Thread: Morgause
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Old 13th April 2011, 12:11 PM   #5 (permalink)
alchemist
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Re: Morgause

Good point at which to end it

I have little of help, because I thought it was excellent. On my first read, I noticed the "mead" issue, and would have preferred "dribbled". That's just quibbling, because it reads easily and clearly, and makes the protagonist sympathetic without over-egging her isolation.

Just one thing; I presume this is from the body of the work rather than the beginning? If so, fine. If it's an opening, then I think it delves into the backstory too soon.

Good work!
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