[Mark Robson]

Here you go, Joel:

1st Dan - Downright scary - will beat you up!
2nd Dan - Even scarier - will beat you up with one hand tied behind his back.
3rd Dan - Don't blink - will beat you up with both hands tied behind his back.
4th Dan - Terrifying - will beat you up with both hands tied, hopping on one leg.
5th Dan - Extremely terrifying - will beat you up with his eyes closed.
6th Dan - Absolutely terrifying - will beat you up with his eyes closed, both hands tied and hopping on one leg.
7th Dan - Don't go there - will beat you up using only the little finger on his left hand.
8th Dan - Ultimately terrifying - will beat you up by just looking at you.
9th Dan - Totally harmless - has superpowers and will not deign to trouble himself by beating you up. Will just fly away!